Identity. Who we are. Our essence, our being, our drive and desires. Our character; our intentions and our effect.

Also our name, our profession, our look and our style. How we carry ourselves; how we move through this world and who we move along with. All of these aspects play into our identity and the external perception of it, which we express through our words, our wardrobe, our actions and for musicians, our sounds. It’s said that “where words fail, music speaks” (H.C. Andersen). Tempo, tone, key, progression and rhythm, music has a whole other language for which to communicate ourselves.

Identity in music. This was a recent theme of the New York Artists Collective's bi-monthly showcase. For each event, the Collective invites three artists to the stage who share their songs and writing processes in an intimate, artists-in-the-round format. With this, there are three stools on stage, each claiming one for their own, and the artists take turns playing a song and its backstory before then passing the spotlight on to the next. It continues in this manner for about four songs each and is a lovely, intimate evening of music, community, and conversation.

This evening featured Julia Weldon, Elizabeth Wyld and Talay. The night’s theme brought about conversations of gender, sexuality, public perception and industry expectations. Julia Weldon, a genderqueer person, talked about being non-binary and hypothesized how her career, bookings, and sales over the years may have been different (a la, higher) if she were to identify as male, as the music industry, among (just about all) others, is more comfortable putting money behind men. But she doesn’t identify as such because that’s not who she is. She’s a genderqueer person who, circling back to Brownstein’s wisdom, has made deliberate and intentional career choices so that she can live her truth both off and on stage. And while those choices may not be raking in record sales, she’s built a career that she’s both proud of and motivated by. One of those choices has been to specifically play LGBTQ and allied festivals, such as the Womxn Fuck Shit Up fest in DC which she had just played the day prior. This decision was made not only to support the LGBTQ community and fellow musicians, but also because it’s in these spaces where she feels most comfortable, supported, respected and authentic. This, in comparison to larger, more mainstream events where the population is resoundingly heterosexual.

Our environment, friends; it matters.

From here, the conversation steered to ‘women in music,’ noting how a band made up of three women is considered a “girl band” whereas a band made up of three guys is simply “a band.” There is no qualifier; go figure.

For Elizabeth Wyld, who identifies as a woman and a musician, being a ‘woman in music’ brings many assumptions about who you are, your sexuality and what people think you’ll do because of who they think you are. She spoke to her past life of being a dancer; a woman with long hair and a small stature who was often seen in costume. This hi-femme appearance was what people were familiar with and what they grew to expect. Yet, as humans and as creatives, we grow, we shift we, we alter and experiment. So when she cut her hair and began opting for more flannels and button ups in place of “feminine” clothing, it threw some folks for a loop because it didn’t align with their long-held perception of her. For Wyld, though, it felt great and it felt freeing. I can relate. I cut my hair short last year and my style has shifted to the masculine-of-center section of the style spectrum. I have gotten my fair share of double-takes, uncertainty and subway glares. I’ve also gotten my fair share of wide-eyed smiles, compliments and affirmation. It ain’t always easy but it feels damn fine living in your truth and embracing the soul-deep desire to grow and evolve.

This is the sentiment Talay then echoed in talking about her coming out, recalling the evening where she kissed another woman and had the feeling, “oh yeah, this feels good. This feels right.” And from that moment forward, that’s what her focus was; living her truth in all aspects of life, including her music where she then began writing love songs about other women. This writing process brought about the realization that, historically, there aren’t many songs by women affectionately crooning out “she/her/hers” pronouns. And this isn’t to say there aren’t queer, women-identifying artists in the industry; that would be the furthest thing from the truth. But for one reason or another (maintaining record sales, social acceptance, record label security, etc.), those artists aren’t able to or comfortable with sharing this part of their heart, so they change the pronouns or avoid them all together. This has begun to change, though, with openly-out artists like MUNA, Lucy Dacus and H.C. McEntire - some of my personal favorites - releasing high-acclaimed albums, along with Hayley Kiyoko and the incredible Janelle Monáe who upended the pop scene this year with her Dirty Computer audio-visual release. With this hope in clear view, Talay noted how she looks forward to hearing even more songs written by and for the community, continuing to diversify the music landscape with songs about queer love.

From here, the conversation veered to Melissa Etheridge. Are we surprised? I’ll bargain a resounding ‘no.’ But what did take the audience by surprise that night was the impromptu “I’m the Only One” jam session the three broke out into with dramatic passion and frantic eyes as each looked on to the next trying to get a sense of when they should bring the song to an end. The answer: stay true to the song and sing it all the way through. It was magical.

For those interested in their own slice of NYAC glory, mark your calendars for Sunday, October 21st at Rockwood Music Hall, 6PM. The show will feature Akie Bermiss, Kaylyn Marie and Ali Carter, and you can secure your tickets here. To learn more about the New York Artists Collective mission and podcast, visit www.newyorkartistscollective.com or follow the crew on Instagram @newyorkartistscollective.

Hope to see y’all there!

xxChris

Photo Credit | Leo Marsco